Emergency

An emergency update on behalf of the truly wondrous scrap that took place between Killian Hayes and the entire Orlando Magic squad. Suspensions have been handed down, and while Will has already claimed Old Man Team alum Cory Joseph in the wake of Killian Hayes, we can still have some super nerd fun with this Magic team.

The full list of suspended players (only for one game, but still)

Cole Anthony

Mo Banba

Wendell Carter Jr

RJ Hampton

Gary Harris

Kevon Harris

Franz Wagner (Staggered suspension for next Wednesday)

Admiral Schofield (staggered suspension for next Wednesday)

That's right, the NBA suspended so many Magic players that they had to stagger the punishment so Orlando could field a team, hahaha.

This is great news for us. So let's get to it before any of ya'll get wise and pull the trigger before I get the chance to send this out while I'm very much at work.

If you want a one-game boost: go out and grab Admiral Schofield for tonight. He's been actually playing for them, so he really might start tonight. Either way he'll get a ton of minutes

If you want a two-game boost: take a swing on ol' Caleb Houstan, who was getting spotty minutes before the entire team got into a fight. This is gonna be one of the worst games you've ever seen. I'm amped

Now, onto the remaining roundup

Tyrese Maxey - He's likely to come back tonight. And while I've already grabbed De'Anthony Melton, there are rumors that Maxey might come off the bench. I don't need to tell you how huge that would be, so if anyone wants to take a chance on him and then pay close attention to the Sixers lineup for the next week or so, have at it

Stanley Johnson - That's right, Stanley Johnson. He apparently got traded to the Spurs (who knew?) and he's been putting up consistent minutes and numbers. Had to give Flat Stanley a shoutout