Final Week (Regular Season)

It's the final week of the regular season and there are some key matchups going on. 

First: Peanut vs Daniel. The Portland P***stars sit at 5-14, in a not-so-comfortable dead last in the East. Mike Honcho's Magic Men sit at 4-15, second to last in the West. They split the season series, and while I don't know what the tiebreaker is, here's what I do know:

If Peanut wins he's in the playoffs as the 8 seed

The league has a playoff predictor for some reason, and it's giving Peanut a 56% chance of making it. Math is hardly my strong suit, but those aren't the best odds

Peanut's best players are Josh Okogie and Drewbanks, and this is likely their final week of eligibility

Daniel has stolen and buried Thybulle and Naz Reid with his refusal to update his roster. If he played the game the way it's meant to be played I have very little doubt he would win this week and force the unknown tiebreaker

That being said, Demarcus Cousins has been his starting center every day for the entire year

Second: Old Man Team vs Isaac. OMT fought and clawed their way into playoff security, but this matchup has nothing to do with them. Isaac is tied at the top of the league with Will, both at 16-3. Will won the season series, but Isaac plays the easier opponent. Here's what I know:

Al Horford and Timelord are out tonight (Mike Muscala's coming for that ass)

With the buyout market over, OMT is as deep as ever, and ready to dip into the eternal well of the Milwaukee Bucks if necessary

Steph Curry is back. Combined with IQ going all the way off, that pretty much means Isaac's gonna take care of business and keep the pressure on Will

Third: Will vs Steven. Here's what I know:

Password is Taco holds the tiebreaker over Isaac, so with a win Will seals the one seed

Kenrich Williams, GP2, Ricky Rubio, and Mo Bamba are dealing with injuries

Kelly Oubre's gonna win him this week regardless

By all accounts Santi Aldama should be raking it in for Steven, but he posted a pretty sad 9 points on Sunday. Josh Green did even worse

Devonte' Graham and Delon Wright are gonna keep this as interesting as they can

Now for some shoutouts

• Shoutout Immanuel Quickley for putting up 88 fantasy points without a double double. 55 minutes is INSANE and he didn't even break a sweat.
• Shoutout Tyus Jones for dropping 91. Haven't checked in a while, but that could be the record. Ja who?
• Shoutout Delon Wright for playing so well that we had to notice he's been starting for Monte Morris
• Shoutout Tari Eason for being the second-highest scorer last week
• Okay shoutouts over, time for Mean Dad to step back into the room. It's a Revolution Update
• Vanderbilt is a starter. It's been a couple weeks since the trade and he slotted firmly in even before LeBron's injury. Michael, you've got until the playoffs start next Monday
• Josh Richardson is interesting, because for some reason he was starting, but then he got hurt or something, so he's okay but I'm watching him
• Malik Beasley is a starter, too. And I know I told you he'd be fine until DLo came back, but you've got til Monday
• Kmart Jr has been starting for an embarrassingly long time but since I missed it, he's got til Monday
• Tyrese Maxey started on Sunday, but now Toby and PJ are hurt, so he should be alright. Keeping an eye on it, though
• James Wiseman's a weird one, but he's hurt so
• Derrick White is fine due to a timely (for Will) Timelord injury that will see him miss 7-10 days
• Kelly Oubre has a month, which by my math sees him solid through the playoffs
• Drew Eubanks has been starting for a minute, I've just been slacking. Nurkic is day-to-day, so we should be fine
• Josh Okogie is a starter, but the new-look Suns are so new that he's earned some leniency. He's got 2 weeks
• Delon Wright is good because Morris is hurt, but it's been happening for a while so we're gonna reevaluate that next week
• Josh Green has started the last two games. Mavs are desperate to find something, so he's got some leniency, but we're looking into it
• Gabe Vincent's been starting for a month and I missed it. Unless Lowry comes back this week Vincent's got til Monday as well

If I missed anybody let me know. It's the real deal Holyfield next week, so let's be on our Ps and Qs, shall we?